MORE ON GUIDANCE

Last week while I was reaching into the linen closet, a question casually crossed my mind which I thought of asking my friend. Suddenly my Guidance spoke up and suggested I wait, because my friend would be emailing me the answer to that exact question soon, when he was ready. That was the feeling I got, and so I decided to listen to it. Too often my ego and its accompanying emotions barge in and push that Guidance feeling out of the way, and either I ignore it or I don’t hear it altogether. As it turned out, several hours later that evening, I received an email from my friend telling me news that was the precise answer to the question I was wondering. The timing and the preciseness of it was too uncanny to be mere coincidence, and recognizing that old familiar Guidance feeling couldn’t be mistaken. Oh boy, that got me excited. I’d been in such a slump for a while now that I was spending pretty much every waking moment mentally yelling “Where is my Guidance and why aren’t you talking to me?!”

I love how it sneaks its way in when I’m least expecting of it, like when I’m moseying around the house not mentally yelling “Where’s my Guidance?” I need to remember that.

I spent the last four years working on writing a memoir-style book on my paranormal and spiritual life experiences, and it wasn’t until writing everything out that I realized how prevalent that thing I call my Guidance was in my life. I adopted that term from my friend Bruce Moen. He's written five books on the subject of afterlife exploration. His website is http://www.afterlife-knowledge.com/. Most of what I’ve learned I attribute to his teachings and the great influence he’s had on my experience with the paranormal. The way my life has changed now, it’s a pretty common conversation for my circle of friends to be discussing what we do nonphysically. And I think that’s one of the most important things I’ve learned from Bruce, is that we are already living nonphysically. This physical world and our physical selves are not all there is. It’s taken me a few years to really grasp that concept, and I’m still learning, still asking questions. And Bruce is always patient with me, explaining things again as many times as I need it. In today’s conversation about that topic he said there is nowhere that I don’t already exist, and exploring nonphysically is just a matter of shifting my focus of attention there.

So that’s where my thoughts are focused these days, shifting my focus of attention and awareness back to that old familiar feeling of what I call my Guidance. I’m finally beginning to understand it now. It’s my connection to my higher self, all aspects of my own Consciousness. Those psychic experiences I’ve had all my life, in all their various forms, are all times when my physically-focused consciousness was connected with my higher Conscious self and able to pick up information I’d usually have no normal means of knowing. For years I used to wonder who was responsible for giving me my psychic information. It was me! All those instances of psychic clairvoyant visions, ESP, psychic dreams, OBEs, and hearing The Voice of my Guidance—all that information was coming from another perspective than what this limited physical world self could know. I look at it that my higher self perspective sees the bigger picture, whatever that may be, while the me here in the physical world perspective has to live moment by moment through time and space.

Bruce always reminds me too that exploring nonphysically requires the use of nonphysical senses to be able to interact there. As I think about it, we use nonphysical senses here in this reality all the time too, but we just don’t really think about it. An example of what I mean happened the other day. I had just cleaned out my daughter’s closet and found an old back pack filled with seashells. I mentioned this to her and then put the pack back in the closet. Later that evening, she wanted to look at the seashells and asked me to go get them. I went into her bedroom without bothering to walk all the way over to turn on the light. I knew I wouldn’t need any light to find what I was looking for. Because I had been the one who organized her closet and had located the seashells, I knew exactly where they were. As I reached into the dark closet, being completely unable to physically see a thing, I thought to myself, “I can’t see it but I know it’s there” and in my mind’s eye I saw exactly what I was doing. I didn’t need the bedroom light to be on for that. I realized I was using nonphysical senses to find what I was looking for. And it also made me realize that while I’m trying to explore nonphysically, I shouldn’t get hung up on struggling to find what I’m looking for. If I can pinpoint my intention of what it is I’m after, then I can easily find it. It’s just a matter of reaching out for it, like the intention of reaching for a bag of seashells in a dark closet. Exploring nonphysically is just a matter of knowing exactly what you want and shifting your focus of attention there. I’m going to remember that the next time I’m focusing on exploring. Just reach out and grab it. It’s there.

Making those connections to my Guidance is what I’m working on these days. Instead of waiting for it to happen to me again, I’m consciously bridging that connection as often as possible now, practicing that process, recognizing that feeling, and living and creating in that area of consciousness. It’s an exciting realization for me…to finally actually realize that those gifts of psychic, paranormal, and spiritual experiences I’ve had all my life weren’t just bestowed upon me by some kind stranger who took pity on me or felt I deserved some grace of kindness at the moment. I had had an inkling all those years that one day I’d be learning the reason behind all those weird and wonderful experiences. I’d hoped that they were there for a reason, all leading up to some grand realization.

And as whenever I learn something new, I still find myself hoping that there’s still a lot more to learn.

DIVORCE

My divorce gets finalized next week. I’m not sure what to expect, but we have to appear in court before the judge. The only other times I’ve been in court were (1) for our bankruptcy many years ago, (2) when my husband had another speeding ticket to take care of, (3) and when we took our next-door neighbors to court to get a restraining order once. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not vindictive or not a nice person to live next door to. This guy threatened to shoot my dog, would yell at my kids, and made threats against us! Anyway, I think it will be a huge relief once the divorce is actually finalized. Everyone’s asking me if I’ll have a celebration party afterward. I’m not a party person. How about this…anyone reading this who has even the slightest notion of what relief I’m feeling, make a toast and send some good vibes my way.

GOURDS AND SQUIRRELS

My daughter Abby and I went to a pumpkin patch/cornfield maze/animal farm place right before Halloween this year.

Most of the pumpkins were going bad, so next year I’ll go earlier in the season. We did get some great gourds though, of every size, shape, and color you could imagine. I don’t know what it is about them that’s so appealing. When I got home I decided to Google how to cure them. I knew there was a technique and years ago I found out that that technique isn’t to just store them in the shed or garage. They really go bad that way. What I found on the Internet is that all gourds really need is lots of air. The wind outside is what dries and cures them slowly so they don’t rot. It’s a shame that they do lose their bright colors, but it’s still a neat process. I have no idea what I’m going to do with them once they’re done, but I think it’s just the process of doing something that’s what’s most appealing to me.

Here’s just a few of them

What the web sites don’t warn you about when it comes to curing gourds are the squirrels. A couple days after Halloween, I placed the gourds on my back patio and spread them out neatly on a plastic shelf. I planned on rotating them every few days (as instructed) so that all sides had a chance to be exposed. However, our first time out there to rotate we found some of our gourds were missing. I had had a gut feeling our “pet” squirrels would be tempted to come eat our gourds but I didn’t actually believe they’d have the nerve to come all the way up to the house. However, there was evidence in the yard.

Gourd guts were all over the place. I was a little peeved. I couldn’t tell which of my unique little gourds were now missing. At first I thought I could out smart those little critters by barricading my gourd shelf with a laundry basket placed over the top of it. I should have taken a photo of that…looked silly, but I thought what the heck. Those squirrels won’t come back now. I was wrong. The next day there were more traces of stolen gourds all over my patio. I knew I’d have to get more creative to out smart the squirrels around here. Here’s what I came up with:

Ok, what this is is my gourds now confined to a plastic milk crate on top of the swamp cooler, with that plastic shelf now covering the top of the crate. (Later, I had to place a heavy rock on top to keep the shelf from being blown off). This is more than 6 feet high, and being covered like it is I figured I’d won. I was afraid they wouldn’t be exposed to enough air in that crate, but so far so good. It’s been 4 weeks now and I’m still rotating. Some sides of each gourd are beginning to cure. They lose some of their color and become very dry, but as long as they are still hard with no mush they are curing properly.

Here are some pics of one of our pet squirrels who we feed regularly. I attached a basket to the back fence with a plastic dish inside for their treats…mostly breads, but they’ll eat crackers and cookies too. I once had half of a blueberry pie that was a week old and the kids weren’t going to eat it. I set it outside and it was gone! (I hope that didn’t give them indigestion or anything).

Cute little fella. Abby, 11, loves every living creature in the world just as much as I do, but I am not at a place right now to allow real pets, no matter how much she begs. Told her she could have all the squirrels she wanted, though, and that we’d keep them in the back yard and feed ‘em treats. She’s ok with that for now.

PERSPECTIVE

Back in 2004 is when I really first began choosing to learn meditation. I didn't really have an idea of how to do it but had been reading books about it. I wondered if there was a correct way to meditate, or a formula to follow. As usual, my analytical mind was taking over too much, and I was making it way more complicated than it needed to be. So I thought, I have no idea what it means to raise my vibration or raise my awareness, but I'll just go with the intention that that's what I'm going to do. Late one morning home alone, I relaxed my mind and body, and set my mind with the intention of learning how to meditate and connect with my spirit guides. All the books say we all have them, and I wanted to communicate with mine.

I soon began to doze off. Now and then I'd lightly awaken and then quickly "put myself under" again. After quite some time I woke from a very deep, restful sleep and feeling as if I'd been very, very far away. I slowly opened my eyes and noticed the sunlight shining through the windows was a soft golden color as if the sun had made a point to shine more prominently than normal into my bedroom. For a moment I felt very lightened by the effect as if a huge weight had been lifted off me. And suddenly in my mind's eye I saw a clear picture of a marijuana leaf. Being naturally gifted visually, I wasn't shocked I was able to see such a clear vision in my mind; however, it being a marijuana leaf baffled me. That's marijuana, I thought. I wonder why I'm being shown this. I don't have anything to do with drugs. This doesn't have anything to do with me. My feelings were such that I was in no way associated to something so negative. I felt/heard in my mind, "It's all about perspective. It doesn't have to be something negative. Your reaction to the vision is negative, but the plant can be used in a positive way as well. Whatever your feelings, it's still just a plant. It's all a matter of perspective."

The feeling/voice I heard was right. My reaction to the plant didn't change the fact that it was still just a plant. If I changed my perspective, then my feelings changed. It was at that point I actually heard as clear as a physical voice, "When you get bogged down, we get bogged down." I heard it clearly. I was shocked to actually hear these words spoken. And it made me think, I never use the words "bogged down". These words hadn't come from my own thoughts. It made me wonder, who's the "we"? Did it mean there's a group of guides who work with me? Is this what the books meant by higher self?

I began to understand that the communication between myself and my guidance can't work to its fullest extent unless I change my perspective. So what did changing my perspective really mean? Since then I've often thought about it, wondering if it means trying to see things from a different viewpoint or in a different light. I’ve learned that taking any negative reaction, however slight, out of the equation definitely had to do with it. Negativity narrowed my perspective down, positivity opened me up. Maybe that was the formula to making meditation work and learning to communicate with my guides.

It can be the hardest thing to do sometimes, trying not to get bogged down by negative thoughts and feelings. Changing perspective, I've learned, can't be faked. You have to actually change something inside yourself in order to open up to that greater perception, and what I’ve learned is that experiencing the feeling of love is the fastest way to do that. Focusing on love immediately shifts your perspective. When I see the need in my life to work on that, I can actually feel the change inside me taking place. And it does work; once you change your perspective, you do feel different. And you do feel differently about not just that one aspect, but about things in general. Things start clicking into place faster. Synchronicities happen. Those happy coincidences that really aren't coincidences at all. You realize that that positive perspective is the magic to making consciousness work for you.

MY BLOG

Today I decided to start a blog. Thought I'd give it a try, play around with it, and see if it was something I would like to do. This will be a place to record what I did with my day, my thoughts, feelings, small victories, funny stories, and I'm sure a few other things I haven't thought of yet.